Seeking comfort
by dalek-senpai
Summary: After waking from a nightmare about your parents death you call out for your angel, Samandriel. After some time he shows and you ask him to stay and cuddle with you.


You sit in the back of your parent's car, fidgeting, not able to contain the nervousness that was starting to build in your stomach. You know it's just a matter of time till they come out, but part of you worried. You always worried, which was ironic because you are a hunter. Being a hunter and worrying don't really go hand-in-hand. This is why you left the hunting life behind. You knew that someday your worry and second guessing would get someone killed and you'd rather leave the hunting to the professionals anyway. But somehow you found yourself right back at square one. Actually, it really wasn't hard to see why. Living on your own and hustling pool is not that easy when you are only 16, especially when people keep calling the authorities on you. So eventually you broke down and tracked your parents to a small town in the Midwest, where they were just finishing up a hunt. They took you back instantly, which surprised you because you assumed they would despise you for leaving the way you did. You just kind of up and left in the middle of the night with a poor excuse for a goodbye letter left behind to answer, not even a fraction of the questions they may have had about your leaving.

Just days after getting back together with your parents you were already on the trail of another hunt. You were hoping to have some time with your parents before your first time back in the swing of things, yet here you were waiting for what seemed like ages for your parents to exit the morgue that they decided was absolutely necessary to break into. You start to panic, thinking the worst. Maybe they set of an alarm and the cops showed up. What if there was someone still in the building when they busted in? Your feared where quickly set aside as you looked up and saw your parents walking out of the building, taking their sweet time getting to the car.

"What took you guys so long?" you questioned with a concerned look on your face.

"Nothing, we just had to make sure our hunch was right, which it was," your dad replied almost upset that he was right this time.

"So we are hunting a Djinn," you say, trying to rack your brain for any information that may be left over from all of those late nights studying lore.

"Not just a Djinn, we think it is several of them," your mother said in a tone that wasn't all too comforting.

"Okay, so let's kill these bastards," you say in the most hunter sounding voice you could come up with. But deep down you were afraid. Thinking, why out of all of the things that go bump in the night, why did your first time back in the game have to be Djinn. It's not that they were particularly hard to kill it just if you left one of them get a hold of you, then you're basically a goner.

"Did you hear me, Y/N?" your thoughts were cut short by your mother's now irritated voice.

"Uh, no sorry I was thinking about something, it's nothing. Um, what were you saying?" you ask almost afraid to admit you weren't listening to your mother.

"I said that we have to find out where they are hiding first. Although your dad and I have a pretty good idea where they might be. So for now we are going back to the motel and we will do some more research and we will hit the ground running first thing tomorrow." you could hear the annoyance in your mother's voice, but you smiled none-the-less. Being home was starting to feel good.

You awoke screaming, tears brimming at your eye. Just when you thought these nightmares had stopped plaguing you, here they are creeping back into your brain, slowing destroying you. The images of what happened after that simple conversation in the car began flashing before your eyes. You looked around your room and all you saw was that warehouse, your parents slowly having the life sucked out of them from these off breed Djinn. The ones your parents didn't tell you that you were hunting. You make eye contact with your father, the look of horror on his face as your mother lay there lifeless. You shut your eyes trying to make these images go away, reminding yourself that they aren't real, that you are in the bedroom of a small apartment you own. The adrenaline began making its way through your body, putting you on the verge of nauseousness. You try and move out of your bed, but you feel paralyzed with the memory that your nightmare brought back. You feel the tears as they roll off your cheeks and onto your bed. I had been 8 years since your parents had been killed, yet it felt just like yesterday. God, does 8 years feel like a long time to keep blaming yourself for what happened. But no matter how you looked at what happened, no matter how many times you played that scenario over and over again in your head, they always ended up dead, and worse still with their blood on your hands. You try and push all of these thoughts out of your head, but no matter what you do, they keep popping back to the surface.

You look around your room once again and realize just how alone you are, how alone you've been these years. Sure, you've made friends, but nothing really solid, because you don't want anyone else to get hurt by your stupidity. But there was him, your angel, Samandriel. He never really bothered you, he would come if you needed help with something you were working on but that was it. You got the information or advice you needed from him and then you sent him on his way. You started to wonder if maybe he would make an exception just stay here with you till the morning.

You decided to call out for him. "Samandriel, if you're there, I… never mind," you decide it's a dumb attempt to try and call an angel down from heaven just to give you the comfort you don't deserve. You force yourself to lay down and try to go back to sleep even though just the idea of sleeping, of those nightmares, brings tears to your eyes.

You laid there for what felt like hours, but was realistically maybe 45 minutes. You heard a crashing sound followed by what you could have sworn sounded like rustling feathers. You can hear footsteps start to move towards your bedroom door. You quickly reached for the gun on the nightstand by your bed, a move that you were all too familiar with and aim it at the door, awaiting whatever was coming through the door. The door opened to reveal a very surprised angel.

"Samandriel, what the-. What are you doing here?" you spurt out.

"Y/N, you prayed for me. Don't you remember?" he said with a confused look on his face. You quickly realized that you were still pointing a gun at him and put it back in its place on the night stand.

"I'm sorry," you whisper sheepishly.

"That's fine. If anyone should be apologizing, it should be me. I didn't come when you called and for that I'm sorry," he replied with that confused look still on his face.

"Oh… no.., I-it's fine. You didn't have to come here Samandriel, you can leave if you want," you say, your voice barely audible at this point.

"But, you called me here. There must be something you need me for. Do you need help with a hunt? Wait its 3 am, shouldn't you be sleeping?" he inquired while stepping closer to your bed.

You push further back onto your bed and immediately scold yourself. You called him here so you wouldn't feel so alone, yet here you are trying to push him away. Trying to distance yourself from anyone that could provide you any sense of what felt like a normal life.

You move slightly closer to the middle of your bed and pat your hand down on the spot next to you. "What does that mean?" Samandirel questioned, looking at the spot where your hand laid.

"It means I want you to sit here, next to me," you responded with a hint of a smile to your face.

"Oh," he replied awkwardly sitting down on the bed,

"So the reason I called you here was because I…I had a really bad, well more like horrifying, nightmare and I'm just really afraid of going back to sleep by myself. So anyway, I was wondering if you would stay here and maybe cuddle, or just lay here with me. I mean you don't have to if you don't want, I just thought I might do it," you rambled and proceeded to look away from him feeling your face burning red from embarrassment.

"Uh... Well… what do you mean by cuddle?" he inquired.

"Oh its umm, well like two people lying down next to each other and usually one of them has their arms around the other person. Kind of like a hug, but you are laying down," you say and start to wonder how weird that must've sounded to an angel of the lord whose physical contact with you is minimal.

"Okay, I understand," you could practically see the steam coming out of Samandirel's ears as you saw him trying to fully process what you told him. "I am really sorry Y/N, but I don't think I should really be doing something like that. I will gladly stay here and watch over you as you sleep in case these nightmares should happen again," he said while avoiding eye contact with you.

"Oh…okay, that's fine, yeah, it's not like I actually expected you to take me seriously. I was just kidding Samandriel," you were aware of the hurt that resonated in your voice when you said this and hoped he didn't pick up on it.

You laid down hoping that the subject would drop and you would be able to get some sleep. You lay there just waiting for sleep to come and take you away from your current situation. Just as you are about to give up, you feel pressure on the bed behind you and soon Samandriel is behind you. "I have realized it was rude of me to reject you any sort of comfort and I have decided to do this cuddling thing with you. Now do I just stay here even after you have fallen asleep or should I leave?" you can hear the concern in his voice, which you chalk up to his lack of the human experience.

"Uh, it's whatever you want to do Samandriel. I can't really make you stay," you say, hoping he would stay long after you had fallen asleep.

"Oh, well then I guess I will stay," he said with a hint of a laugh behind his words.

You two begin to settle down and you can feel the apprehension Samandriel has about wrapping his arms around you, about being this close to someone he is supposed to just watch over and protect. But once his arms around you, you can feel his body start to relax against yours, with your own body relaxing in response. You started to adjust your body to fit into the curvature of Samandriel's and you started to feel that comfort, that bodily connection that you had wanted from someone for so long yet denied yourself these years because of your fears of being close to anyone.

"Y/N, would you like me to move? I feel like I am making you extremely uncomfortable, and I'd rather not do that. Y/N?" Samandriel tried to grab your attention, not realizing you were just moments away from sleeping.

Gather that remaining bits of energy you had you turned slightly towards him. "Everything is fine Samandriel. I'm fine, you're fine. There's no reason to worry so much," you breathlessly replied with a smile playing across your lips.

You move back into place, making yourself comfortable once more. A few small moments pass and Samandriel says quietly "It's no problem, honestly. I can move if it would make you more comfortable," his words becoming an echo from his previous comments as you drifted off into what you felt was going to be the best sleep you've had in 8 years.

"Samandriel, I told you, it's fine," you mumbled out just as your body succumbed to the sleep you had so been desperately seeking.


End file.
